Really, why?

So I wake up in the middle of the night to moisturize. Yes, you read it right. To moisturize. I have extremely dry skin and I can’t sleep because my skin screams for attention. I am literally restless. One of my many many quirks. But really even I can’t get over my skin’s desperate need for hydration in the middle of the night. Makes me wonder why me.

I guess this has been one of the many many things that have had me puzzled in the last few days. Don’t get me wrong, I am really not the kind who plunges into depression and wallows in self pity but the fact is this time around even my close friends are wondering “why you”. Last year, I took a series of decisions that didn’t go in my way. At least it looks like they didn’t go in my way. And I am still dealing with repercussions of the same. Wondering what would stop this chain reaction of bad news and miserable circumstances.

One of the things that I have awestruck by lately, is the butterfly effect. So many times, our decisions are based on someone else’s life decisions. Boss quitting workplace. Boyfriend craving for different cuisine. Family demanding more attention. We do so many things because others in our lives need something from us. Or because someone else’s decision changes our lives. Our decisions and the logic/circumstances/beliefs behind them are so complicated that nothing that we do can be termed as right or wrong. Everything is circumstantial. And looking back the only thing that we do know is that we did the best we could do at that particular time. This is the only thing that is helping me get through the day and not regret the decisions that I took last year.

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