Frail

I feel extremely frail around him. It is like I am about to fall apart. I avoid talking to him on difficult days like these. His knowing eye never misses small details. Like my missing smile. I am terrified of his questions. I am scared that he’d ask me what is wrong and it will become the cue for me to fall apart and break down. Worst bit is, I can’t lie to him. I can’t just say I am having a bad day and move on. He’d know I am lying. I feel like he looks through my soul every time he just looks at me.

I want to reveal everything. I want to tell him how I feel, not just about him but also about my world. About my life. I know he will understand. He will agree. And he will hold me when I break down. And yet I can’t say a thing.

He is perfection that belongs to someone else. An equally deserving someone who values him just as much as I do. They are the perfect duo. The kind you hear of in fairy tales, the kind you see on glossy magazine covers. I can’t help but admire them. But days like these when I know that only he is my only cure and my only friend, all I do is wish he didn’t know me.  And I wish he didn’t care because he makes me feel so much more frail.

Advertisements

One thought on “Frail

  1. I could feel every word as I read. This could be soooo tuff. And the last part is the worst. It’s most difficult to let go when they still care.
    Tight hug and loads of strength to you!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s